7 Common Hang-ups When it Comes to Clutter and How to Overcome Them
- Molly Ishmael
- Apr 2, 2022
- 7 min read
Updated: Apr 12, 2022
For a short while I worked as an organizer, and in that time I heard some pretty interesting reasons for hanging on to clutter. While there's no "good" reason to keep something that doesn't serve us any longer, there are certainly reasons nonetheless.
Maybe by evaluating other people's "clean-up hang-ups" we can finally let go of our own! Let's explore the 7 most common reasons for hanging on that I have seen...
Focusing on your end goal makes the process of letting go positive and enjoyable!
While there are probably hundreds of possible reasons for hanging on, let's explore these seven as a good starting place. I truly believe that clutter weighs us down and bums us out, so why not do a little soul-searching when it comes to having it in the first place. Let's get into it!
Seven Clean-Out Hang-Ups and How to Overcome Them
1. "In case I need it sometime." The old classic. Also know as, "I might use this someday." Not today. But one day.
I once had a lady tell me that she was keeping hundreds of old CDs because she once saw a TV show where they made a wall of CDs and it was a cool effect. I paused then asked her simply, "Do you intend to do this in your home?" She paused then said "No," and she threw out all the CDs on the spot. I doubt she's thought about them again since. Ironically, the CDs were reminding her of a possible project she didn't actually want to do; now that they're gone, she doesn't have to take up mental (or physical) space for a pointless, unfinished project.
Perhaps it's time to finally let go of that box in the garage...
2. "I've had it a long time." Holding onto something just because we've had it a long time is circular reasoning. It's basically saying, I'm keeping it because I already have it. Not only does this clutter a space with items that have long since lost their value to your life, but it makes it harder on yourself to find the things you actually need every day. Try this: tell yourself that you're ready for a new chapter in life and to open it, you have to close the old one. Basically, if an item is not specifically benefitting you now, let it go.
In case you missed the first article I wrote on how to approach de-cluttering, check it out here:
Items in the ol' junk drawer, perhaps?
3. "I still use it sometimes." On the surface, this sounds like a good one. But if something is being used just because it's there, it may be superfluous to your actual needs. For instance, you may use a can opener all the time, but if you have four can openers, donate three. What's that you say? Some of them don't work as well as the others? Mmnn-hmmn. Speaking of broken things, let's move on to #4.
Broken things are a real downer to keep around.
4. "It just needs to be fixed." What to do with broken things? In a word, fix them! But if you don't care to fix something right away, then be honest with yourself... you don't need it. Most of us tend to hold onto broken things for awhile intending to repair them. Eventually, we hide the item away in box labeled "miscellaneous" or a junk drawer. But if we don't love or need something enough to repair it promptly, we probably don't need it at all. After all, we've gone this long without actually using it. So why not stop weighing ourselves down with false promises that we will fix something when we can just let it go? After all, keeping broken items is just filling the home (and life) with unloved things.
P.S. Speaking of junk drawers, I personally don't believe in them. Why would we want to keep a drawer full of literal junk? Now if by "junk drawer" we really mean a drawer to nearly store notebooks, pens and scissors, honestly I wouldn't consider that junk. But if it's a random collection of mismatched items that jam the drawer closed, it's probably time to clean out a bit.
Does throwing things away feel negative or wasteful to you?
5. "Waste not, want not." Ok this is one of my favorite sayings! My husband will tell you that I say it all the time, even to my two year-old daughter. I'm all about trying to up-cycle or at least avoid unnecessary waste. But sometimes this wise saying can also double as an excuse when it becomes about refusing to let go just on principal. Perhaps you know you don't use it, you admit you'll never need it, it has no sentimental value - but there's nothing wrong with it and so it stays!
Perhaps depending on how you were raised, you can't imagine throwing out "perfectly good things." But here's a question: Is something "perfectly good" if it's sabotaging your life? What if you constantly trip on it or it makes you late or it prevents you from achieving a clean and peaceful home? What is the purpose of having things if they do not serve you but instead hold you back? If you realize that you're holding onto such things, I advise that you satisfy your conscience by giving away the items instead of adding to the landfill. And you know what? I bet you'll never even miss them.
Keeping "important" items in dusty old boxes seems like a paradox.
6. "Someone left it to me." Hanging on to something out of a sense of guilt or obligation to the person who left you the item is somewhat ironic if you're just stashing it in a dusty box in the hot attic or humid basement anyway. If your intent is to honor the person who passed, why store hoards of their things in a "leftover"-ish sort manner? Personally, I prefer to keep only a few special things that I'll actually use or thoughtfully display, and that's it. I feel that I honor the memory of the beloved departed best by enjoying the things they also enjoyed. And if I can't do so anymore, I simply give it away to someone who will.
If you're still having a hard time, perhaps try these ideas:
Consider actually USING the item! I love family items and sometimes they just need a little sprucing up. So instead of adding to the trash heap, perhaps up-cycle. Most things are meant to be used, not just stored or displayed. So go ahead - clean out the boxes and eat off the good china every day! That's what it was made for, after all.
If you really won't use the item but there is a family member pressuring you to keep the heirloom, simply offer it to them. If the person insisting that you keep it don't want it themselves, you certainly aren't obligated to keep it, either. No one can tell you what to do in your own home. Well, they can tell you, but you don't have to listen.
Try taking a photo of meaningful things you are discarding. It may give you peace of mind to have a photo if you're not keeping the actual heirloom anymore. Grandma's table may not fit in your apartment, but the family photo of everyone sitting around it certainly will!
Note: I DO recommend offering heirlooms to other family members before discarding something that someone else may have wanted.
What to do with gifts that are no longer being used?
7. "Someone gave it to me." This is probably the trickiest one so my suggestions are a bit lengthier. Not wanting to keep a gift while also not wanting to offend the giver can be a touchy subject.
Here are some possible ways to let go of gifts tactfully without causing a family (or friendly) feud:
First of all, approach the situation with gratitude. People can tell if you don't like something and immediately give it away versus least trying to enjoy the gift before gracefully donating it later. Wait a short time as well; it's a bit awkward if the person pops by the very next day and the item is already gone. That's experience talking; feel free to learn from my many mistakes.
Take photos of yourself (or the kids/recipient) with gifts as soon as they're given. Text the happy photo to the giver with a note about how much everyone loves it. Then even if you end up letting go of it later, the giver will always know how much you appreciated the gift for the time you had it.
When you're ready, just let go of the item and don't say anything. No need to make a big dramatic announcement that gets back to the giver and upsets them. (I've seen it happen. Not everything needs to be public announcement.)
If someone asks where their gift went (most people won't even notice) tell them, "In the spirit of giving, I recently donated some beautiful things to a charitable cause. Someone is going to be blessed when they receive it." Most decent people won't be offended to hear this explanation - especially if it's true.
If someone is offended that you let go of their gift, just apologize. "I'm sorry, it certainly wasn't my goal to upset you," then shift the focus to making plans together. By spending time with the giver, they'll be reassured that giving away their gift wasn't a metaphor for how you feel about them.
Bottom line, once someone gives something to you, it's yours to do with what you wish: keep it, paint it, repurpose it, or regift it. You're entitled to your choices for your own house... And others are entitled to their own reactions to those choices, too.
Letting go can be a peaceful act of gratitude.
Finally, remember that decluttering doesn't have to mean thoughtlessly chucking things into the trash heap. Even clutter that belongs there doesn't have to be sent to pasture with a negative mindset. I make it a point to have a moment of gratitude as I discard something: grateful that I had it, grateful that it helped me and my family as long as it did while we needed it, and now, grateful that I can let go.
I know I've shared it before, but if you haven't read it, the title says it all!
And when it comes to the give-away pile, enjoy the process as you think of how happy your things are going to make someone else. This is better energy for your things anyway, because now instead of cluttering up your home, they are able to be a blessing to someone else. What a lovely new life for your things, happily blessing others now their time in your home is done.
With Love,
Molly
P.S. For more design & decor fun + updates on our newest projects, subscribe for free HERE:
Comments